April 27th

Well, it's 2 am on april 27th. April 27th used to be my anniversary, and this one would be the 9 year mark. (If you want to get technical, it is still the 9 year anniversary of when I started dating Jen, we just aren't together anymore, so there won't be any celebrating, I don't think.)

I guess it's just one less thing to worry about. No valentine's, girlfriend's birthdays, anniversaries, etc.

But that's not the whole story, and it's not even close to the truth. I liked buying things for Jen. I wanted her to feel the way I did when I read amazing books, or listened to mind-shatteringly great albums. I miss these things.

But I think back to when we started dating, and how Jen told me that she preferred to be called "Jennifer". I did that for years, spending the time to add those extra syllables thousands of times in conversation with her, or with other people. At some point, I stopped doing that, and went with "Jen" instead.

Now, today isn't an anniversary anymore. And I'm still too much of an asshole to add those 2 extra syllables to her name. This isn't self-loathing, or any great revelation. It's just a microcosm of how relationships disintegrate right in front of you.

A bunch of other things have happened in the 3 weeks since I wrote.

I got a raise.

I went on dates with a bunch of terrible women, and one good one.

I'm sure there's some music that's completely taking over my life.

But it's april 27th. I'll write about all that typical shit on some other non-anniversary.

Ministry's last show, and my $1000 mistake

Well, it's been a while since I last wrote, and a lot has happened.

First, I went to see Ministry's final show. Despite the fact that they only played 3 songs written before 1998, it was really good. I also caught a guitar pick at the very end of the show, so that makes for a nice little souvenir.

Aside from that, the theme of the night was karma, and how ignoring karma can really fuck you over.

If you read a few posts before Ministry, I say that I lost my ipod. Well, I got my ipod back, and I had it for about 8 hours. Fate swept it away again, when I left my backpack under a table at the bourbon, along with my digital camera. So, replacing my camera, ipod, headphones, and backpack is probably going to set me back about $1000.

But the good thing is that I've come to see that I needed something like that to happen if I was ever going to be smart about what I do with my stuff when I'm drinking.

Trying to stay positive. I get to read on the bus now.